11/27/2001 07:25:41 AM
i don't think i need change to feel positive about where my life is going at this point, maybe just a feasible plan. i'm an avid atheist living in the bible belt. a lover of pocky, green tea candy and sushi in a place where cultural tolerance is almost nil. i'm a fat, vivacious and liberated woman, like a fish out of water. unappreciated by most. withering away. i need to leave, or this place will absorb me. i'm not sure if husband understands it, he is from a place worse then this, so he likes it here. the bible thumpers annoy him but for the most part he digs virginia. i want to go back home, he says i'm homesick, and this may be true, but i have been gone for years, and didn't get homesick before. i'm just tired of having only memories, and i don't think this place is anything to hang on to. there's problems though. i'm not going on about this for no reason, because if we could just go, trust me we would have a long time ago. i wouldn't be belly aching about it then. he has an assault conviction that will probably affect any immigration petition on his behalf, and i feel like an asshole, i just got my immigration sorted out, and now i want to leave... but whatever, who said wives have to make sense. if it can work it will, $$$ willing, i just hope at this point that the law will be on our side, so my hopes won't be crushed.

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